TT bullets: Late as usual for me!

Damn, I had planned to write earlier, then got distracted by family (and a shitty movie) and forgot what I was gonna write! [Getting old sucks :P]

I still have a few of the bullets in my head, even though it’s after midnight here…

  • I’ve noticed that most of my self-photos over the past week have been much more silly & ridiculous than the solemn, sad/mopey pics from earlier this month… Things still haven’t gotten much easier with work, but while it’s continued to kick my ass, I’ve been trying to keep a more positive attitude. I’m even hoping to actually have Friday off this week! - It’ll be my first non-Holiday weekday off since pre-February Snark!
  • Speaking of Snark, I’ve already booked my room for that Friday & Saturday night this August.  I’m hoping to see more of the city this time, in my last two trips there this year I’ve really only gotten to see a very small portion of Manhattan. 
  • I really want to go to the D.C. & Boston tweetups also, but I don’t think I can afford to do both, plus I’m not entirely sure my work schedule will calm down enough by the time of the D.C. trip.  
  • I was already looking into booking a room for Boston, and the suites look huge, definitely big enough to split two, or possibly three ways… If anyone is interested in sharing a room for Boston, please let me know, either here or by KiK [username: ‘robgraham’].
  • I realized late-Monday that today (well, now yesterday, the 29th) made exactly a year since Baxter’s sudden death… I can’t even believe it’s been that long already! - I still haven’t gotten myself any new pets, but lately my nephew’s dog has been staying with us more often… He thinks he’s been being sneaky by having Kiki here more often, but truth is I’ve grown attached to her now and don’t really mind the company when my nephew’s at work… She’s a really great & well-behaved dog! [Shhh! Don’t tell him I said that! :P]

Okay, there’s more than I’ve written in a while… I really should’ve gone to bed an hour ago!

Goodnight Tumblrs!

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: ...A little late--

--Tagged under: Snark--

--Tagged under: WIPI--

Truthful Tuesday: Somebody (*cough* me *cough*) really NEEDS to start taking some time-off from work!

Hmm, and I wonder why I’ve been so burnt-out and grumpy lately…

Yes, these are the time-off hours I already have *earned* currently.  The sick-time is frozen at it’s max, and won’t accrue anymore until I actually use some of it, and the vacation-time is about two weeks away from hitting it’s 200-hour cap.  

…Okay, so which one of you wants to come up to Connecticut & cover for me so I can actually TAKE some of this time?!!

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: work--

--Tagged under: Personal--

--Tagged under: Hi- My name is Rob and I'm a Workaholic--

Truths on a Tuesday…
  • One month from tonight I’ll be in New York City! - I’m so psyched for SNARK, and I can’t wait to meet so many of you in-person! 
  • I’m still having many internet/wifi issues with my laptop, and it’s driving me a bit crazy.
  • The two things I miss most using Tumblr from my laptop are leaving my GIF photo replies & posting music
  • And I REALLY miss being able to video chat. :(
  • It also sucks having to use the Tumblr phone app all the time… especially since leaving replies with it is still like playing Russian Roulette: sometimes it works, and sometimes it freezes & I have to reboot the phone & lose my place in catching up. - This is why I haven’t been leaving many comments lately.
  • With this Internet/Tumblr protest tomorrow, I’m guessing it will be my most-productive day at work in well over a year! 
  • I swear, every Tuesday I have a million things that go through my mind to post, but by the time I actually sit down to write them, *POOF* they’re gone!
  • I know there was more I wanted to say, but can’t think of the rest right now.
  • Okay, that’s it - I’m off to find a proper sign-off song to lead into the blackout… I have one in mind, stay tuned (-That’s *if* my connection lasts long enough for me to actually post it!)

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: Me--

Truthful Tuesday (a little late again)

I realize I’ve been kind of quiet lately, it’s pretty much been from a combination of:
• Burnout from work- I’ve been having covering for multiple people lately, and have been completely exhausted by the time I get home… I really need to take some of my 188 hours(!) of vacation time soon, to recharge & get my head straight.
• Burnout from Tumblr- Let’s face it, as of last week I hit 18 months here, and have barely even taken a day off from this place. Hell, even when I had my 8 day black-out over the Summer, I still managed to do at least a couple of posts a day from my phone, just to still be “involved” a bit here. Also, after all this time, I feel like I’m repeating myself a lot lately, and I absolutely hate doing that.
• My laptop’s failing wifi card- It’s been getting increasingly frustrating over the past month to continuously get disconnected and have to keep relying on the iPhone app. - I’m pretty sure I’ve narrowed down the problem to the wifi card, because my wifi works perfectly for all of my other devices when the laptop is off… When it’s on it not only screws up its own connection, but also all my other wifi-using devices (iPhone, iPad, Roku, etc.) - If any of you techies out there know an easy way to fix this, PLEASE let me know!

More Truths while I’m actually writing (currently typing on the Notepad app on my phone):

• One of the few things that actually HAS sparked me creatively lately is the Project 365 photos… I know I’m not that great at it, but it’s really renewed my interest in photography, which had been dormant for the past couple of years. I know so far they’ve been mostly skylines, but I don’t plan to keep it as just sunrises & sunsets, I’m hoping as the year goes on to have more variety in the shots, and to use my actual digital camera more, rather than just iPhone pics.

• I’m really looking forward to taking some photos in NYC during SNARK weekend, and I’m hoping the weather cooperates.

• If you think distance can really suck when you meet someone you truly care about on here, let me tell you: The combination of distance *and* a failing internet connection can sometimes be completely un-fucking-bearable… I really miss Skype video chats that don’t get disconnected multiple times. *sigh* - It can truly be maddening, especially when your main backup, KiK, has been having it’s own connection problems lately!

Alright, that’s it for tonight… Thanks for listening, and Goodnight Tumblrs!

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: Personal--

--Tagged under: Me--

Truthful Tuesday: Holiday/Family Edition
  • While my real life family has done just about everything to kill my Christmas spirit this year, this Tumblr community keeps helping to bring it back. 
  • Speaking of family, it appears that I didn’t have the full story on my brother & sister-in-law’s “surprise divorce” the other day… It still sucks, but apparently it wasn’t as much of a “surprise” - In fact it was 11 months in the making, and she knew about it but thought ignoring it would simply make it “go away”… 
  • After having a LONG, emotional talk with my brother last night, I feel kind of shitty for going off as much as I did on Sunday… but at the same time, I feel better that I had this place to blow off steam *before* I talked to him, because I probably would’ve said some things that I regretted if I had let loose like that to him personally… It’s still a shitty situation, but no where near as shitty as the version my Dad told me on Sunday. 
  • No matter who is right or wrong, and what all the “full truths” are, it’s still going to make for an extremely awkward Graham Family Christmas Eve & Day… I already have a very bad feeling that I’ll have to break up a few fights this coming weekend, my Dad & brother already almost went at it yesterday. :(
  • I’ve been more excited about gifts I’ve sent to some of my Tumblr friends than one’s I’m giving in real life… It’s amazing how much some of you have become a real part of my life.  
  • Thanks to Amazon, I’ve been able to send out all my gifts, but unfortunately they WON’T help me with my cards! - So far, twice I’ve sat down to start them, and both times was distracted by my brother’s family mess… At this rate, some of you may not receive yours until 2012! :P  

…Oops, looks like it’s not Tuesday here anymore… I guess I better just save & post! 

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: Personal--

--Tagged under: My Family--

Random thoughts, truths & other brain droppings…
  • I just finished my *third* night of leftovers from Turkey With Tumblrs, and still have plenty more left.  Melissa, Sara & Kiki really did an outstanding job on all of the food that day. - As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a longtime bachelor who usually lives on microwave dinners, frozen waffles, and restaurant food, so I truly appreciate all of the amazing home-cooked food.  
  • I’ve struggled with writing anything since Sunday… This weekend was such a whirlwind from incredible happiness on Friday & Saturday, to unimaginable sadness on Sunday.  There have been so many times I’ve sat down to write, to try to separate the great early moments of the weekend from the devastating loss for my friends that followed it… but I don’t really know how to. - This is why I’ve been mostly silent on here.
  • I just wish I knew a way to take the pain away… I wish I could give more than virtual hugs… I wish I could say more than “I’m sorry” and “I’m here if you need me”. 
  • I wish I could help so many of you who are struggling financially this holiday season… Sometimes I read your posts & just wish I could hit the lottery, and be able to help all of you; both to have a great holiday for you & your loved ones… and to help bring you all to SNARK in February.
  • In related news, I tend to get way too empathetic… especially at this time of year.

In happier thoughts…

  • I really want to thank Melissa so much, for both welcoming us into her beautiful home for “Turkey with Tumblrs”, AND for inviting me along to New York on Friday with her extra ticket to Carnegie Hall. We only had less than two hours after getting off of our train at Grand Central to see some sites, quickly eat something, and make it to the show by 8pm - But thanks to Melissa’s knowledge of the city (and her trusty iPhone GPS) we manged to fit a lot into such a short time.
  • I hope I didn’t talk Melissa’s ear off to much on the ride to NYC… We had only met in “real life” literally minutes before getting in the car and driving two hours to catch the train in Fairfield, and then spending an hour ON the train into the city, and I know that I talked so much that I was already losing my voice by the time we got on the train!  - This is actually very rare for me, as I usually am kind of shy when I first meet people… until I get to know them better, but I very instantly felt very comfortable talking with her - very similar to the comfortable feeling I immediately had with Sara back in October. (And this time we didn’t have to push a car for 40 mins to “break the ice”!)  So it’s 2-for-2 in great Tumblr meet-ups so far!
  • This trip also helped to provide a me with a great “preview” for my longer NYC trip in February for SNARK.  In fact, the first thing Melissa made sure to have us check-out was how close the SNARK hotel is to Grand Central (Answer: it’s extremely close- just two lefts out of the Lexington Ave. exit and you’re there!)  I definitely feel more prepared for February thanks to my quick trip this past Friday.
  • Oh, and here’s a quick shot of our SNARK hotel (thanks again Michele!)…

  • Before Friday, I had only been to New York once before, and that was TWENTY years ago! - And I really didn’t get to see much of the city that time, it was just a quick bus trip for a Red Sox/Yankees game, and I all that I remember from that was that Roger Clemens was still pitching for the Sox, and started that day… and of course that my Red Sox won the game.

Wow, for not writing much lately, I guess I had more to say than I thought! - If you’ve stuck with it, thanks for reading this far… And to close, one more shot of me in New York (taken by Melissa)…

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: Meeting the Internet--

--Tagged under: Turkey With Tumblrs--

--Tagged under: onethousanddays--

--Tagged under: impeccablepeccadillo--

--Tagged under: SNARK--

I posted last year about my annual Tuesday-before-Thanksgiving tradition… Every year the hospital I work for gives us pies on the Tuesday before the holiday (we have the choice of Pumpkin or Apple, I always choose Pumpkin), and every year I cut a huge piece of it on the night we get it, and have it for dinner while watching NCIS.   When I made that post last year I wasn’t certain how long I’ve been doing it for, but today I realized it’s been as long as I’ve been single: seven years now.  Seven years of being alone for the holidays.  Seven years of acting like I “prefer” it this way… when truthfully I’m not sure how much longer I can take it. It all just kind of hit me like a ton of bricks as I was trying to think of something “Truthful Tuesday”-worthy… The real truth is that the last relationship I was in ended 7 1/2 years ago, when I was 31, and last week I turned 39. That means I’ve lived almost all of my thirties completely alone… and at the rate I’m going, I’m going to hit forty the same way.  Slipping further & further away from remembering what it’s like to be involved with someone… slipping more & more inside myself.   Is this really how it’s going to be forever?  Eating my pumpkin pie alone, while the memories of sharing the holidays with people I’ve loved in the past slowly fade away?   ….Damn, this pie doesn’t taste nearly as good as it used to.

I posted last year about my annual Tuesday-before-Thanksgiving tradition… Every year the hospital I work for gives us pies on the Tuesday before the holiday (we have the choice of Pumpkin or Apple, I always choose Pumpkin), and every year I cut a huge piece of it on the night we get it, and have it for dinner while watching NCIS.  

When I made that post last year I wasn’t certain how long I’ve been doing it for, but today I realized it’s been as long as I’ve been single: seven years now.  Seven years of being alone for the holidays.  Seven years of acting like I “prefer” it this way… when truthfully I’m not sure how much longer I can take it.

It all just kind of hit me like a ton of bricks as I was trying to think of something “Truthful Tuesday”-worthy… The real truth is that the last relationship I was in ended 7 1/2 years ago, when I was 31, and last week I turned 39. That means I’ve lived almost all of my thirties completely alone… and at the rate I’m going, I’m going to hit forty the same way.  Slipping further & further away from remembering what it’s like to be involved with someone… slipping more & more inside myself.  

Is this really how it’s going to be forever?  Eating my pumpkin pie alone, while the memories of sharing the holidays with people I’ve loved in the past slowly fade away?  

….Damn, this pie doesn’t taste nearly as good as it used to.

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: Sorry - I didn't plan to be this Emo when I began writing this--

--Tagged under: Personal--

--Tagged under: Thanksgiving--

TMI / Truthful Tuesday…

If I continue to sit in this bathroom at work for much longer, I fear I may have to end-up pulling that little ‘Emergency’ cord for assistance.

HELP! …I CAN’T FEEL MY LEGS!!!

--Tagged under: I believe following Rachel for over a year is beginning to rub off on me!--

--Tagged under: That was definitely a Double-Flusher--

--Tagged under: TMI--

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

Truthful Tuesday… (Birthday post-mortem)
  • I just *finally* finished responding to ALL of the birthday messages I received yesterday… If you didn’t get a private message, or didn’t see me post your message, that means it was probably one of the messages that Tumblr lost on me yesterday
  • You folks were absolutely incredible to me yesterday, between all the love I received from you, both here and on Facebook (at least 1/2 of my messages there were also from Tumblrs!).  Thanks to all of you who took a moment to either send me a message, reply, or heart those posts yesterday.
  • The overwhelming amount of messages yesterday helped to distract me from the fact that my longest ‘real life’ friend (of over 30 years) completely forgot, or ignored, my birthday.  In fact, other than a quick surprise party at work yesterday, the “real life” portion of my birthday kind of sucked… I barely even heard from my own family yesterday.
  • I truly treasure you people. *Hugs* to ALL of you.

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: Personal--

--Tagged under: Birthday--

--Tagged under: Thank You--

Final Truthful Tuesday post for this week…
  • My birthday is in 6 days! (Monday the 14th) - It’ll be my “first” (aka- actual) 39th birthday.
  • Unlike most years, I’m actually *not* dreading my birthday this year, mostly because of YOU folks. - Last year, all the love I received from my Tumblr friends made my birthday one of the best I’d had in years… Now that I have five-times as many friends on here as I did at this point last year, I’m actually really looking forward to this one!
  • While I’m looking forward to *this* one, I’m already dreading NEXT year’s birthday, you know my For..um… Fort… oh, I can’t even SAY that ‘F’ word, but I’m already feeling it breathing down my neck!  
  • The only upsetting thing about this year’s birthday is that this will be the first one I have without my good friend Jen living here in CT. (she moved to North Carolina six weeks ago).  For the past five years, she has been the only ‘real-life’ friend I could always count on to celebrate my birthday with me… and most years she would even make my birthday cake! - That’s the thing that truly sucks about getting-older, it seems to get more and more difficult to make new friends every year.

In non-depressing/non-birthday news: 

  • I’ve lost about 20 lbs since my physical back in August (when I weighed-in at my highest weight ever!)  I’ve even gone down a pants-size since then.  
  • I truthfully wasn’t even trying to lose weight. - Between losing my power, and not being able to cook for those eight days at the beginning of September, followed by major oral-surgery where eating most solid-foods was very painful for about six weeks… well both of those events back-to-back really helped to shrink my stomach and cutdown on my usual portion-sizes.  So, the *real* secret to weight-loss: Extreme Mouth Pain! :P

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

--Tagged under: Me--

--Tagged under: Personal--

Sick Days: I do them wrong…

Today I’m taking a very rare sick-day from work.  

How rare you ask?! - Well for the past five years I’ve been mostly stuck on the 504 hours that my employer caps the accrual of Sick-Time at. - So, if I have so much time on the books, why don’t I take it?  Well, mainly because I’m the one person who does the majority of my job, and I really just screw myself when I take time off, because I usually end up paying dearly for it when I return.

So far, in the seven hours I’ve already been “off” today I’ve…

  • Talked to my boss, twice.
  • Talked with coworkers from my building, who were worried this morning, since I’m usually the one who comes in first & turns off the alarm.
  • Either talked on the phone with, or emailed seven of the ten satellite programs that I usually support/oversee on a daily basis.

So, basically the only ‘advantage’ for me calling in sick has been the fact that I’ve been able to do all this without having to get showered or dressed… and I’ll still return to a mountain of crap that wasn’t left on either my email, or voicemail.

Yeah, I really feel like I’m doing this whole “sick-time” thing wrong! :P

--Tagged under: Me--

--Tagged under: work--

--Tagged under: Truthful Tuesday--

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